Dear Myles,
One month and 2 weeks old
After a couple of hours in Target, you woke up from your nap and let us, as well as the rest of the patrons, know it was feeding time. We quickly took you out of your stroller and put you in one of those wraps that Mommy is now an expert at tying up. After we checked out, we thought it was best that you get fed in the car- it’d be more peaceful for us all on the drive back home.I tell Mommy I'll run back into the store to use the bathroom since home is a half-hour away, and rush hour is quickly approaching. I leave the car and keys running with you two in the back.
I walk across the parking lot to make my way back to Target. A new hack we learned is to park the furthest we can from the store front - fewer cars, fewer people, and more space to unload the stroller, car seat, and all of your other bags - yes, we are your bellboys. I walk through the automatic double doors, and just as I'm about to make my way onto the escalator, I see a boy, about 13 years old, with an older woman who I assume is his grandmother. His hands are around his elbows, and he's shaking his head - he's afraid to get on the escalator.
These moments find me in life a lot. In middle school, while I was on my way home, I witnessed a woman getting off the bus with several heavy grocery bags. The bus operator had to keep the doors open because she had to make two trips on and off the bus. On the second trip, she came off the bus with her young daughter. I offered to help her, and although I could tell she was reluctant to accept the support, she did; I could see she was tired. I followed her lead and walked her to her apartment, which happened to be in the same direction I was heading home. Your grandmother never heard this story, and she would probably be upset since one of her number one rules was never to talk to strangers..
The woman's daughter, who couldn't have been more than 5 years old, kept looking back at me with curious and happy eyes. The walk to the woman's apartment from the bus stop must have been about two blocks. She kept thanking me the whole time. I told her it was no trouble at all. I placed the bags down on her doorstep, and she asked me to wait for a moment while she closed the door. This is it, I thought, the whole reason grandma asked me not to talk to strangers.
As I was getting myself ready to be kidnapped, she returned with a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Thank you," as she tried handing it to me. I told her she reminded me of my mother and that whenever I am not around, and she is struggling to carry some grocery bags after a long day, I hope someone helps her.
The women and the boy are standing on the landing of the escalator, a space just wide enough for others to pass and make their way up to the Six Flags of adulthood. The woman is patient; she is in no rushShe stands by the boy's side, encouraging him to take his time. Gently coaching him, she says, "It's okay, just hold on to the sides." He doesn’t budge.She continues, "I'll go with you, you don't have to worry." He's frozen; stuck looking at the revolving stairs that are threatening to take him alive, feet first.
"I walk to where they are standing and ask him, 'Do you want me to walk up with you?' The woman with the boy looks surprisingly relieved. The boy responds with a yes from his mouth, but his feet do not move.
'I'll be right behind you,' she says. 'Yup, you can hold my hand, one foot in front of the other,' I add.
He does not budge. I put my arm around him. I am in coaching mode now too. 'It's totally okay to be scared. Take your time; I've got you,' I say. He wants to face this fear, but his feet won't let him. He is shaking his head now. I have to go to the bathroom, and Mommy and you are probably wrapping up. About a minute passes by, and I pull my last card. . 'Listen, I am going up the stairs to use the bathroom. I hope I do not see you still down here when I come out.' He nods and responds, 'okay.' I go up the escalator and see another woman cast her lot. I hear her start saying, 'You know, I used to be scared of elevators too.'"
"I finish up in the bathroom and make my way to the escalators on the descending side. I am relieved not to see the boy and the woman standing on the landing of the escalators. My last card, the last piece of my Exodia, worked - or at least I thought so. As I turn my head to the elevators, I catch sight of the woman and the boy taking it instead. I smile and make my way through the double doors and to the back of the parking lot."
I think about these moment a lot. The paralyzing fear on his face coupled with the patience of the woman with him. I think about how I showed up, excited and confident that this young boy would see himself in me and together we would counter the Everest of Escalators. I especially think about my disappointment at the moment they took the elevator instead. But I am grateful for the woman.
I hope when you are afraid of escalators, I will be patient with you. I hope the world is patient with you too. Even in the moments when I am not there, I hope someone says they are with you, puts their arm around you, and shows patience, even when you decide that you can't.When you are afraid of escalators, I hope we all remind you that the elevator is there too.
Love,
Dad
Great read. The real question here is did you take the twenty? Lol. Jk
My fear used to be jumping off of ledges ad a kid. I’ve still not gotten over it completely.
I hope we all remind you the elevator is there too 😭♥️